2025 Bunfight!

[LorenSharp]

I visited a monastery and as I was walking past the kitchen I saw a man frying chips.
I asked "Are you the friar?"
He replied" No, I'm the chip monk".
 

[Hockeyboy76]

Why do ducks have feathers?
To cover their butt quacks!

[LorenSharp]

 

The two white actors in Black Panther also played Gollum and Bilbo Baggins.

 

Meaning they are the two Tolkien white guys of the movie.
 

[Richard Humm]

There's a virus going round that makes you forget 80s bands. Nobody knows The Cure.

[Hockeyboy76]

The urge to sing “The lion sleeps tonight” is just a whim away. 

[LorenSharp]

I've been to a lot of places, but I've never been in cahoots.
Apparently you can't go alone. You have to be in cahoots with someone.
I've also never been in cognito, either. I hear nobody recognizes you there.
I have however been in sane. They don't have an airport. You have to be driven there. I've made several trips.
 

[bootneck]

I was in continence once, just passing through.

[flyboy2610]

7 hours ago, LorenSharp said:

I have however been in sane. They don't have an airport. You have to be driven there. I've made several trips.

 

 

[ArnoldAmbrose]

8 hours ago, LorenSharp said:

I have however been in sane. They don't have an airport. You have to be driven there. I've made several trips.

I've been there/here. Still there/here - couldn't/can't find my/our way out. 🥴

 

8 hours ago, bootneck said:

I was in continence once, just passing through.

Been there too. I thought it was rather damp. 

 

Also been in censed a few times.

[psdavidson]

I was in disposed, Everything had been given away

[LorenSharp]

A pessimist sees a dark tunnel
An optimist sees a light at the end of the tunnel
A realist sees a freight train.
The train driver sees 3 idiots standing on the tracks.

[Hockeyboy76]

Justice is a dish best served cold, Otherwise, it's just water.

[LorenSharp]

If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring?    

 

Pilgrims
 

[flyboy2610]

14 minutes ago, LorenSharp said:

If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring?    

 

Pilgrims
 

And allergies.

[jimmaas]

Have you read the book Charles Dickens wrote about the Peloponnesian Wars.......

 

"A Tale of Thucydides"........

[flyboy2610]

If corn oil is made from corn, and peanut oil is made from peanuts, what's baby oil made from? 😱

[LorenSharp]

I tried to catch fog yesterday. 

 

Mist
 

[psdavidson]

10 hours ago, LorenSharp said:

I tried to catch fog yesterday

Mist

The effect of clouded judgement

[LorenSharp]

Why was six afraid of seven?

because 7-8-9.
 

[Hockeyboy76]

I always take my wife morning tea in my pyjamas. But is she grateful?
No, she says she’d rather have it in a cup.

[LorenSharp]

Why was Pavlov's hair so soft?

 

He conditioned it.

[LorenSharp]

I swallowed a bunch of Synonyms yesterday.

 

It gave me Thesaurus throat I ever had.

[flyboy2610]

I finally got it all together!

And then I couldn't remember where I put it. 🙁

[ArnoldAmbrose]

6 hours ago, flyboy2610 said:

I finally got it all together!

And then I couldn't remember where I put it. 🙁

G'day, at my age this is no longer a joke - it's a way of life. Oh well  .   .   .   (Has been for quite a while, come to think of it).

Regards, Jeff.

[LorenSharp]

What's the difference between a well dress man on a bicycle and an poorly dressed man on a tricycle...

 

Attire