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Short Clean Jokes V


Spookytooth

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Amazing how many of these jokes are either from ISIHAC or early goons.

Anyway let's do the ISIHAC guests at the ball jokes

 

first off let's welcome Mr and Mrs Roid and their daughter...... Emma

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24 minutes ago, pigsty said:

I completed a half-marathon at the weekend.  I've left the other half in the fridge - I'll have it with a nice cup of tea later.

There'll be snickers at that one. (groan emoji)

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Due to human beings becoming taller over time, ladder manufacturers are finding it necessary to increase the spacing between the rungs.

 

Scientists have confirmed that this is due to climb it change.

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Just had some corporate training on e-mails & was told we had to use the OHIO method - Only Handle It Once.

Someone at the back blurted out to the meeting that around here connectons are that bad we have to resort to the CHICAGO method - SHit I CAnt Get Online.

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“So, what did you think of my Pastoral Symphony last month?” one conductor asks another over coffee.

“Quite acceptable, on the whole, though personally I would have taken the fourth movement a little more allegro.”

“Ah.  You were present for my 1812 - a triumph, I’m sure you’ll agree.”

“Possibly.  You did let the special effects overwhelm the instrumentation towards the end.”

“Hmm.  How about my Evening with Vaughan Williams in Manchester?”

“Pedestrian, I’m afraid - an uninspired selection.”

“Right, that’s it, I've had enough.  Just who do you think you are?  I’ll have you know, I’ve conducted more orchestras than you can shake a stick at!”

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