Jump to content

Short Clean Jokes V


Spookytooth

Recommended Posts

On 6/15/2023 at 4:21 PM, Bullbasket said:

A Roman walks into a cafe holds up 2 fingers and gets 5 coffees.

Then he walks into a bar and orders a martinus.  "Don't you mean a martini?" the barman asks him.  "If I wanted more than one, I'd ask for more than one," he replies.

  • Haha 10
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Every ten years, the monks in the monastery are allowed to break their vow of silence to speak two words. Ten years go by and it’s one monk’s first chance. He thinks for a second before saying, “Food bad.” Ten years later, he says, “Bed hard.” It’s the big day, a decade later. He gives the head monk a long stare and says, “I quit.” “I’m not surprised,” the head monk says. “You’ve been complaining ever since you got here.”

  • Haha 8
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Two old friends crossed paths after not seeing one another for almost a decade.

Utkarsh: "What are you doing these days?"

Sparsh: "PHD."

Utkarsh: "Wow! You're a doctor!"

Sparsh: "No, Pizza Home Delivery."


 

  • Haha 5
Link to comment
Share on other sites

10 minutes ago, pigsty said:

A genuine headline from the Dundee Courier:

Perthshire scientist's premature ejaculation treatment can't come quickly enough

Trust a newspaper to mangle the English language further.

Having said that, the editor that once came up with "Super Cally were fantastic Celtic are atrocious" some years ago, deserves a Pulitzer!

 

Regards

Pete

  • Like 1
  • Haha 4
Link to comment
Share on other sites

4 hours ago, Pete Robin said:

Having said that, the editor that once came up with "Super Cally were fantastic Celtic are atrocious" some years ago, deserves a Pulitzer!

 

Regards

Pete

Or a bullet ...

  • Haha 6
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I poured root beer into a square glass.

Now I just have beer!

 

I once read a book about glue.

I couldn’t put it down.

 

I tried to sue the airport for misplacing my luggage.

I lost my case.

  • Haha 4
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
×
×
  • Create New...