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spaddad

Grump Britain replacement

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I'm wit' youse guys on da speakin' t'ing.

Don't nobody use like, good Inglitch no more?

Ain't nobody gots time fer ta unnerstan' dat.

Tadaze utes dun tok so gud.

 

Interestingly, I have less difficulty understanding someone from Glasgow than someone from Tennessee or Alabama.

Or Detroit for that matter and that's only a few hundred miles away.

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When I were a lad, I met an attractive young lady from Towcester. She was giving me instructions on how to get to her house, which included "take a right at the Elf Centre". All sorts of things flashed through my mind - a hall for leprechauns etc - before I realised she meant the Health Centre. That was 45 years ago, so its not just today's kids.

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18 minutes ago, Ratch said:

When I were a lad, I met an attractive young lady from Towcester. She was giving me instructions on how to get to her house, which included "take a right at the Elf Centre". All sorts of things flashed through my mind - a hall for leprechauns etc - before I realised she meant the Health Centre. That was 45 years ago, so its not just today's kids.

Did you get to meet her?

 

Trevor

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To continue on the language issue.

What was it they said about America and Britain ? Something like     'Two countries divided by a common language'

Local accents don't bother me as they are natural but like the rest of you I agree that some of the current use of words is hideous.

Take the word 'Like'

What is it with  people using it as if it is a comma ? I find myself counting 'likes' rather than listening to the conversation.

My pet hate though is the trend to try and sound more clever than you actually are and use many words when one would have done.

'At this moment in time' ( = now.) is one that springs to mind.

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4 hours ago, Ratch said:

When I were a lad, I met an attractive young lady from Towcester. She was giving me instructions on how to get to her house, which included "take a right at the Elf Centre". All sorts of things flashed through my mind - a hall for leprechauns etc - before I realised she meant the Health Centre. That was 45 years ago, so its not just today's kids.

Just out of curiosity, do you pronounce Towcester like toaster?

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51 minutes ago, Tzulscha said:

Just out of curiosity, do you pronounce Towcester like toaster?

Absolutely, and Cogenhoe is pronounced cook-no :smartass:

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10 hours ago, Scimitar said:

Local accents don't bother me as they are natural but like the rest of you I agree that some of the current use of words is hideous.

I agree with you....But I think that's a common fact everywhere. The same happens here in Spain.....for us in the Canaries, is quite difficult to understand a "continental" when he speaks too fast, specially those from certain regions. On the other hand, we don't pronnounce the final "s", but an aspirate "h"....and so on....They use to say that we speak "singing" in the isles....then, there's the fact that we've got lots of words of english and portuguese origin, that are not used in the rest of Spain...

Despite all those facts, it's beneath contempt the wrong use of language, specially when you know you're doing so....We call that people "functionally illiterate", my apologies if that's not a correct english expression.

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Today's grump : organisations that do not take the weather into consideration.

National Citizen Service, step forward please.

While it is understandable that some children may get sunburn while partaking in outdoor activities,

I do not expect them to then be sent the next day on a 4 mile walk without adequate water provision, followed by 4 hours

on the beach with no shade, and returned home with blistering first degree burns requiring medical attention.

Furthermore I do not expect said organisation, when alerted to their failure of duty of care and apprised of said child's  need to be

kept out of hot outdoor conditions with no shade, to then of all things make said child work outside gardening in the direct sun between 11 and 3 !

Needless to say said child now no longer taking part in NCS......

 

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10 hours ago, Ratch said:
11 hours ago, Tzulscha said:

Just out of curiosity, do you pronounce Towcester like toaster?

Absolutely, and Cogenhoe is pronounced cook-no :smartass:

Ah, now we're getting into the quaint side of the English language, the bit that I love. Worcestershire, Leicestershire, Norwich, Happisburgh, the list goes on and on. Beautiful English names, pronounced in a way to confuse foreign visitors:wicked:.

 

John.

 

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1 hour ago, Artie said:

I agree with you....But I think that's a common fact everywhere. The same happens here in Spain.....for us in the Canaries, is quite difficult to understand a "continental" when he speaks too fast, specially those from certain regions. On the other hand, we don't pronnounce the final "s", but an aspirate "h"....and so on....They use to say that we speak "singing" in the isles....then, there's the fact that we've got lots of words of english and portuguese origin, that are not used in the rest of Spain...

Despite all those facts, it's beneath contempt the wrong use of language, specially when you know you're doing so....We call that people "functionally illiterate", my apologies if that's not a correct english expression.

Don't worry Artie, you do alright, a hell of a lot better than I would if I tried to write in Spanish & a lot better than some Brits.

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20 hours ago, Bullbasket said:

.Assume. It's pronounced bottom.....ume, not ashoom.

I think that the auto correct on here is going a bit over the top. I typed A----S----S to illustrate the first part of the word assume, and the auto correct changed it to bottom, making a complete nonsense of what I was trying to say. I'm aware of the fact that that word in the States is a mild swear word, but it is also an alternative word for a donkey. Can't something be changed with this function?

 

John. 

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Don't know if anyones had a go at this but what about the greatest threat to my sanity since the birth of my 2nd daughter (yep that's right, I've had 2, no wonder I'm a tad towards the dark side) which is the dreaded antipodean upward inflection, dear god why? It's insidious, as soon as a sub 40 year old starts talking  I start anticipating the end of their sentence whilst hoping against hope that they won't do it, but there it is, nerves shot again, it's like being verbally depth charged.

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7 minutes ago, spaddad said:

which is the dreaded antipodean upward inflection,

Steady now!

It's still to early in the day for such technical stuff :)

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Console yourself that only gentlemen have daughters ........!!

 

Rog [father of two lovelies ]

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16 minutes ago, spaddad said:

Don't know if anyones had a go at this but what about the greatest threat to my sanity since the birth of my 2nd daughter (yep that's right, I've had 2, no wonder I'm a tad towards the dark side) which is the dreaded antipodean upward inflection, dear god why? It's insidious, as soon as a sub 40 year old starts talking  I start anticipating the end of their sentence whilst hoping against hope that they won't do it, but there it is, nerves shot again, it's like being verbally depth charged.

I thought this had disappeared. My daughters (I have three) copied this when Neighbours was aired by the BBC in the 90s. Its like every sentence is a question :angrysoapbox.sml:

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20 minutes ago, Ratch said:

I thought this had disappeared.

If only.

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Posted (edited)
1 hour ago, Bullbasket said:

Beautiful English names, pronounced in a way to confuse foreign visitors:wicked:

That’s the whole idea.:lol:

 

Grump for today, well grump for the last couple of days really.

We get all sorts of flying whirlybird type thingies regularly flying overhead; Chinooks, Apaches, those little Robinson ones, and even an Iroquois ‘Huey’ on occasion.

 

Apparently some American big-wig has popped over for a visit. That’s not the grump….

Is there any particular reason why his massive noisy helicopter/Osprey swarm had to fly at roof level over West London?  11:15pm on Thursday night, and various other times.

 

Oi Mate! Keep the noise down…<_<

 

 

And as for accents and the way some people don’t speak like wot the Queen talks.

The most horrendous moment in my life was when I popped round to my brother’s house and heard my own voice as he was going through his phone’s answering machine.

Wot the Eff! I sound like Effing Jamie Oliver! I ashoom my ‘Estuary English’ is a mix of living/working/growing up in London/Pompey and knowing a few proppa EastEnders over the years.

And yes, I drop my aitches and pronounce water somewhat differently than the rest of you.

 

 

(And don’t talk to me about funny accents, I’ve worked in Kidderminster!)

 

Mart

Edited by LotusArenco

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33 minutes ago, LotusArenco said:

 

 

33 minutes ago, LotusArenco said:

 

Apparently some American big-wig has popped over for a visit. That’s not the grump….

Is there any particular reason why his massive noisy helicopter/Osprey swarm had to fly at roof level over West London?  11:15pm on Thursday night, and various other times.

 

 

 

Low level to avoid detection by blimps.......

 

 

 

33 minutes ago, LotusArenco said:

 

 

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My grump is feedback forms. "How well did I do my job?". If you have to ask, probably not well enough. The pinnacle of this is the "would you recommend us to your family and friends?".  Last week I spent a less than tolerable day in hospital having blood removed and cameras inserted into various orifices. On my way out they asked if I would recommend it to my friends. I think my face answered the question.

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6 hours ago, LotusArenco said:

......And don’t talk to me about funny accents, I’ve worked in Kidderminster!

 

Mart

Be grateful it wasn't the 'Black Country'....:whistle:

2 hours ago, depressed lemur said:

My grump is feedback forms. "How well did I do my job?". If you have to ask, probably not well enough. The pinnacle of this is the "would you recommend us to your family and friends?".  Last week I spent a less than tolerable day in hospital having blood removed and cameras inserted into various orifices. On my way out they asked if I would recommend it to my friends. I think my face answered the question.

Commiserations, just don't blame the staff, their just doing what the bosses have told them they have to do.

Someone, somewhere, has lost the plot....completely! :crying:

 

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On 7/13/2018 at 9:48 AM, Bullbasket said:

. I know I'll probably be in a minority here, but it grates when I hear non Americans or non Canadians refer to other people as "guys". As far as I am aware, in England a guy is something that gets burnt on a bonfire on November the 5th.

 

John.

8LXB.jpg

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3 hours ago, PhoenixII said:

Someone, somewhere, has lost the plot....completely! :crying:

 

That'll be me then.

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Got another one. Question first, how would you pronounce the word ECO. I'm going to say most of you would go with "ee-co", at least I hope so otherwise I've got it very wrong. 'nother question. How would you pronounce the word ECHO. I'm going to say most of you would go with eck-o, at least I hope so otherwise I've got it very wrong, again. So if that is the case why does the advert for the Ford Eco Sport currently annoying the bejeesus out of me on the tv have a bimboid extolling the virtues of the Ford ECHO sport. I tell you I'm losing it man, I don't think I can take much more.

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Oh. My. Gawd!

There is a PLOT?!

 

I KNEW it!

It explains so much that I always suspected!

How could I not have seen this!  :doh::frantic::boom:

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10 hours ago, spaddad said:

That'll be me then.

Ahh, but it means you had to have had it in the first place.....:wicked:

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