Hockeyboy76
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Posts
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Posts posted by Hockeyboy76
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John Lennon had a secret art collection, painted entirely in mauve, lilac, violet and lavender.
Imagine all the purple…-
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12 minutes ago, Enzo the Magnificent said:
Yeh, thanks for that. A gobful of Old Speckled Hen sprayed all over the keyboard...
That’s a novel way to clean a keyboard
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I Just walked by the fridge and heard a little voice singing Stayin’ Alive.
Turned out just to be the chive talking.-
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I hate going to MC Hammer’s house. He wont let me touch anything.
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55 minutes ago, Enzo the Magnificent said:
Just sayin'...
What do you get if you divide the circumference of a jack-o-lantern by its diameter?
Pumpkin Pi.-
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U2’s first few albums have been remastered without the guitars on them. It certainly takes the Edge off them.
When The Edge was at school, he was a border.
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Is Australia actually upside down? If so, why haven't they all fallen off the Earth yet?Australia is often referred to as being upside down, because of its location in the southern hemisphere. From the northern hemisphere, the direction of the earth's axis makes it appear as though Australia is "upside down".
So if this is the case, are we all looking @trickyrich’s spreadsheet correctly? Are all the builds in the lower half of the spreadsheet actually in the top half when viewed from here, so actually winning and not losing.
Discuss
Who needs this next
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I got the Bonnie Tyler Sat Nav. It keeps telling me to turn around, and every now and then it falls apart!!
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Got my new Bon Jovi sat nav. Apparently I’m half way there.
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I thought I heard Tubular Bells on my farm last Christmas, but it was just my cold field.
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I have voted, for what I’m not sure, old sausage fingers here has mashed the buttons!
Im sure I will change them later, or will I?, Yes I will.
I have spoken
This is the way
Pink Primer is the future
Due to Quality control issues, @trickyrich has had to remove the proper “back stabbing knives” in the foyer and replace them with those ones where the blade disappears into the handle. Mr Tamiya was complaining that modellers blood was getting into the modellers tears and making Pink extra thin.
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There once was a girl named Irene,
Who lived on distilled kerosene.
But she started absorbing,
A new hydrocarbon,
And since then has never benzene.-
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7 hours ago, Colin W said:
I tried to email Bugs Bunny a letter but apparently he only accepts Whatsapp docs!
Well Played Sir
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Day 1,
I haven’t voted yet, and am open to bribes for tactical voting, if only for the pure fun of upsetting a certain budge smuggler wearing spreadsheet guru’s day.
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Did you hear about the shepherd who drove his sheep through town?
He was given a ticket for making a ewe turn.-
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Winter: the season when we try to keep the house as hot as it was in the summer, when we complained about the heat.
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I try not to tell dad jokes, but when I do, he thinks they’re funny.
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What has five toes but isn't your foot?
My foot.
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I got caught taking a pee in the local swimming pool.
The lifeguard yelled at me so loud, I nearly fell in.-
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I'll never forget my grandfather's last word to me before he kicked the bucket.
He looked me in the eyes and said, "how far do you think I can kick this bucket?"-
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What’s the difference between an old bus station and a lobster with breast implants?
One’s a crusty bus station and the other is a busty crustacean.
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I quit my job at the helium gas factory – I didn’t like being spoken to in that tone.
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I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already.
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I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day.
Now I can't get the cobwebs out of her hair.-
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2024 Bunfight Poll
in Bunfight!
Posted
I had problems booking tickets for an Elvis tribute act, with an automated telephone system.
I had to press 1 for the money …. 2 for the show…