It'sAllGoneHorriblyWrong Posted May 27, 2012 Share Posted May 27, 2012 (edited) Gentlemen I have been studying your activities most closely these last several weeks and have come to the conclusion that you are all indeed worthy of sharing the secret I am about to entrust to you. It goes without saying that any dissemination of the following facts will go down extremely badly with certain interested parties and that subsequent disappearances would almost certainly result. Several weeks ago an aquaintance of mine at my club introduced me to a most singular fellow. His name was Bastable, Colonel Oswald Bastable (ret.), a slightly alarming, rotund, figure with bright red hair and significant moustache. He presented himself to me as an Explorer/Inventor and, over an agreeable supper, proceeded to regale me with a number of stories at once fanciful and intriguing. I shan't bore you with a full account here but will proceed straight to the heart of the matter: Colonel Bastable has disappeared. The circumstances of this vanishment are almost certainly linked to his latest invention, the Bastable Patented Perambulator. Indeed, it was when he failed to return following successful field trials of the Perambulator in the Hindoo Koosh that certain highly placed individuals began to feel a sense of alarm. Before I go into the full facts of the matter, I feel it is incumbent upon me to give a description of the Perambulator. Fortunately this will prove straightforward, as Bastable had the foresight to create a constructible model of his invention with the express intention of causing wonder in prospective purchasers. The basis of the model itself, which is to 1/48 scale, was entrusted to the Airfix Corporation who came up with the basic kit (which, for some reason, they nicknamed the Robogear Spider): A trial fitting of the pieces reveals this somewhat fearsome brute: Note the somewhat fanciful accoutrements to the rear of the vehicle. If one were to speculate, one would suggest that these are meant to represent self-loading howitzers or something similar. Elsewhere, Bastable maintains that Airfix got the cockpit completely wrong, forcing him to have to scratchbuild his own: This, I am sure you'll agree, is much more realistic. I am afraid I am going to have to break off this account at this point. My man George has just informed me that there are several Gentlemen waiting in the Withdrawing room with what may be news of a sighting. Until next time Andy Edited June 3, 2012 by It'sAllGoneHorriblyWrong Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
It'sAllGoneHorriblyWrong Posted May 27, 2012 Author Share Posted May 27, 2012 Alas, the sighting was for nothing. However, there has been more progress on the model construction. Clearly, the Perambulator requires a source of motive power. Equally of course that motive power is provided by steam. The fuel source for this process is not the normal coal, but the more energy efficient and more easily portable petroleum spirit. Again this part has not been provided by Airfix and thus more scratchbuilding was required: Until next time, adieu Andy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Madam I'm Adam Posted May 27, 2012 Share Posted May 27, 2012 A rather intriguing use of the petrolium distiliate...rather volitile fuel what? are you sure that's wise. Perchance this may give a clue regarding the chap Bastables dissapearance. I do rather hope he turns up in one piece, he's a rather wizard inventor. Adam Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kallisti Posted May 27, 2012 Share Posted May 27, 2012 (edited) What what, old Beastly Basty gone and disappeared! Went to school with the chap, used to give him six of the best regularly. Used him in my early billiard ball experiments - hence why he now has that funny walk don'tcherknow! Always knew he was a rum 'un - a perambultor! Whatever next! Edited May 27, 2012 by Kallisti Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
It'sAllGoneHorriblyWrong Posted May 29, 2012 Author Share Posted May 29, 2012 Gentlemen Thank you for your kind observations. Adam - I am assured by Bastable that, as long as the container for the spirit is suitably armoured, the risk of an accident when using petroleum is no greater than that associated with taking a trip on the Hindenburg, one of the finest airships ever to fly. Kallisti - your excited tone suggests that you should partake of another fine tradition of the English public school: the cold bath. Enough said, I think. As far as Bastable himself is concerned, there is still no news. This is in no way true of the model, however, as progress proceeds apace. Once the motive power had been provided for we had the makings of a fine machine: Work then turned to the 'fuselage' with the following result: Most promising, I think you'll agree. Finally, the true nature of the brass legs of the prototype was made plain: Until next time Keeping a stiff upper lip Andy 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
It'sAllGoneHorriblyWrong Posted June 2, 2012 Author Share Posted June 2, 2012 Gentlemen No more sightings of Bastable. It is very strange, almost as though he has disappeared from off of the face of the earth. Still, progress on the model continues. The Perambulator has now received a coat of primer to ensure the proper adhesion of the final coats of paint. Whilst this is drying, it has been decided to furnish a small base for the completed model to present it to the viewer in a semblance of its natural habitat, so to speak. An oval was chosen and real rocks were used to represent rocks: The groundwork was added using ordinary interior filler: Real dirt was used to represent dirt: The painted rocks were masked with Copydex: Green paint was used as an undercoat: And finally, static grass was plastered liberally all over: A bit of touching up and it will be ready to accept its charge. And remember: keep 'em peeled Andy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AndyC Posted June 2, 2012 Share Posted June 2, 2012 Nice work Andy - that base looks great Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Deon Posted June 3, 2012 Share Posted June 3, 2012 Splendid project and elegantly presented I have no doubt. Once my trials in Somaliland are finished I will be heading off to Tibet via Hindustan. I will keep my remaining good ear open for any mention of a giant spider amongst the locals. I hope poor old Bastable hasn't wandered into China as the region is getting a little rebellious. Yours A Wooley Cardigan Major RMLI Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
It'sAllGoneHorriblyWrong Posted June 3, 2012 Author Share Posted June 3, 2012 Gentlemen Andy C - many thanks; I was a bit nervous about using all that static grass. Deon - thanks and thanks for the offer. I fear however that Bastable is no longer perambulating but tempambulating. I shall explain no further but instead will point you in the direction of "The Warlord of the Air", "The Steel Tsar" and "The Land Leviathan" by one M. Moorcock, documenting the early life of young Oswald Bastable. As for the model: it is finished. As proof, I offer the following pictures: This has been great fun; we must do it again some time. Until then Toodle pip Andy M. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Iain Ogilvie Posted June 3, 2012 Share Posted June 3, 2012 Most excellent contraption you have there Andy old chap - and looks bang on accuracy wise to my eye! Where on earth did you find references for this one? Huzzar!! Iain Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Madam I'm Adam Posted June 3, 2012 Share Posted June 3, 2012 Is that the Brunswick Green for the finishing coat? a most suitable colour. It looks a most stable and manouverable contraption. That Bastible is/was an ingenious fellow and you are to be congratulated on your scale representation Adam Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
It'sAllGoneHorriblyWrong Posted June 10, 2012 Author Share Posted June 10, 2012 Thank you (m)Adam for your kind words. The colour is in fact something that Bastable call BRG or Bastable Racing Green. Apparently Bastaple's father used to use the shade on his racing boats before his own rather mysterious disappearance on Coniston water. Andy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kallisti Posted June 10, 2012 Share Posted June 10, 2012 What what, excellent my dear fellow, a marvellous bit of construction there old chap! Hrump, always said that Bastable would come to a sticky end one day! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bertie McBoatface Posted June 13, 2012 Share Posted June 13, 2012 Thats a really classy little vehicle. Excellent work. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
It'sAllGoneHorriblyWrong Posted June 14, 2012 Author Share Posted June 14, 2012 Thank you gentlemen, most appreciated. Andy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Deon Posted June 18, 2012 Share Posted June 18, 2012 Fantastic piece of work, that green is perfect Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
It'sAllGoneHorriblyWrong Posted June 20, 2012 Author Share Posted June 20, 2012 (edited) Many thanks. It is rather sporty isn't it? Andy Edited June 20, 2012 by It'sAllGoneHorriblyWrong Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts