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    • Mike

      Switched Identities   18/06/17

      If you are still having problems logging in and remaining under your own username following the DDoS attack last week, you need to log off, clear your browser's cache, and restart your browser to ensure you clear all the old files from your temporary area.  Then you should be sorted.


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About hovis

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    Obsessed Member
  • Birthday 07/11/73

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  • Location
    Kilrea, UK

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  1. I see traffic on the bridge. Wasn't there meant to be road closures as she sailed underneath? you know, for security reasons?
  2. As mentioned, one of those slowed down classic songs, this time an instrumental of "Mad World" by Tears for Fears. We're in a hospital ward. Everything is in slow motion. Nurses are changing beds, and there's a new mother being handed her new baby, yet THERE'S A BLACK HORSE RUNNING AMOK THROUGH IT ALL!!!! AAAAARRRRRGGGGGHHHH!!!!!!!! Next scene, a "fashionable" gay fella proposing to another fella and yes, the horse is still running past in slow motion!!!! Funeral, school, nope, it doesn't matter where, there's that horse. Then the advert has the cheek to go on and say, the first thing spoken on the ad, "This is real life." I would like to think horses running through hospitals was not real life thankyouverymuch!
  3. Just because your bus can't get past a spilt cart of oranges, would you, as a young, pretty, Audrey Hepburn lookalike, that can't stop blinking, get off the bus and accept a lift from a strange bloke?? What's that teaching our young females!! AND, never mind that, she even STEALS the bus driver's hat!!!! Johnny Depp, with two black eyes, has a brain fart and drives (recklessly) into the desert, past one of those big American hairy cow things, digs a hole and puts his jewellery into it. Now, for anybody who hasn't seen this ad, can you even begin to guess what it's for??? I still don't know myself!!! And what's it with female sanitary products and X-treme sports???? Can you not just wear them and do normal stuff??? (I don't know, I'm a bloke) You're washing yourself in the middle of some tropical paradise, would you pull out a bottle of chemicals (shampoo) and wash your hair, thus polluting such an untouched, beautiful part of nature??? Have you even thought this through??? AND, never mind that, she's screaming in pleasure whilst doing it!! Either said chemicals are burning her head, or the shampoo bottle is a particular shape.... There, I've brought on one of my heads again.
  4. As somebody mentioned, Trivago. Notice how the woman mostly stands with one knee bent? Is one of her legs longer than the other?? Any perfume or aftershave ad, a Hollywood blockbuster in 30 secs with absolutely no meaning or comprehension whatsoever. Girls riding motorbikes with flames, some bloke doing a moody press conference inside a room made of 4 big sheets of cardboard, etc.... M&Ms. Bloke comes home to find his wife in bed with an M&M sweet. Isn't sweets meant to be for kids? So kid's are being introduced to adultery? What?? Happy egg company. "I've got a good idea for an ad, everybody about to eat an egg, or put the box on the table, has to dance around awkwardly......" Wee boy want's to make a spaceship out of the Fairy liquid bottle, (notice it's not a rocket ship anymore as the bottle is rubbish-shaped now), but the Fairy will take ages to use up. Tell you what kid, it's only a flippin empty bottle, I'm sure if you hoke through the bins you'll find another odd-shapped item to make a flippin spaceship out of!!!!! That dishwasher tablet ad where the wee boy dressed as Sherlock Holmes finds some dirt on the glass dish. When it comes out clean afterwards his ma shows him it and he says "bo-ring" Have you ever wanted to punch the wee fella in the face so much??? I'll show you bo-ring kid, why don't you effin do the dishes instead of f@rting around getting BORED!!! Mr Muscle. When it was a UK made ad, he was a wee weedy bloke, but then the Germans or whoever took over and they seem to like big animated butch blokes. Same happened with the Aquafresh toothpaste man and Captain Birdseye, til someone wised up on the latter and we got the salty sea Captain back. Is Mr Muscle and Aquafresh man the same person??? How many toothpaste ads have to get the line in "my dentist recommended"???? ALL OF THEM!!!!! Just because a dentist isn't allowed to advertise one paste above another, it's suddenly happening in the third person!!!! Has no toothpaste manufacturer any different ideas??? A Nissan Juke driving along the pages of a giant book.... WTF were the writers on!!!!! Why would I want to buy a Juke cos of that???? I have to lie down for a bit......
  5. Stunning, and an enjoyable WiP to follow. Just wait til Airfix release the 1/24 scale Wasp, still won't be half as detailed as this...
  6. I know! And my popcorn's all stale now.
  7. Nice one! Hope all goes well for you both.
  8. One thing I feel I need to say about this, just an observation I made. I was brought into the world in 1973 in Belfast, so I grew up with atrocities on the news, in fact it makes you become used to it, immune almost, which isn't a good way to be. After the "Troubles" we have seen many other acts of terrorism around the world and nearer to home. The Twin Towers, Bali, London, Paris to name a few, and the outpouring of grief and strength of the people has always come to the forefront afterwards, and the support for the victims and those caught up from all around the globe is always very heartwarming. However, after the bomb went off in Manchester, I noticed that not only were the Emergency Services really on the ball, but the ordinary people of Manchester all seemed to be singing from the same hymn sheet! Everybody was out offering whatever help they could FROM THE VERY START! It was as if they were ready for it. It seemed like everybody knew exactly what to do, no panic, just get on with it. Of all the terrible events over the last few years I've never known a community move into action so fast. There was little or no mobs calling for this, that and the other. Everyone of every race and creed was in this together, they were all Mancunians. The news of kids being blown to smithereens brought tears of sadness to my eyes, but the news of the people of Manchester reacting as they did just mere hours after the event brought tears of pride to me. My admiration for the people of Manchester is at bursting point.
  9. Wonderful masterclass on how to sphereoidize your knob ends Nigel!! I'll be trying that meself next time.
  10. Mrs Hovis won't eat anything with palm oil in it, they make Orang-utans homeless in the collection of it apparently....
  11. Driving down the M2 into Belfast earlier me and Mrs Hovis passed a large grey Airbus on finals into Aldergrove, can anybody confirm if a Voyager visited said Station today? (yesterday now)
  12. 'bout ye big lad!
  13. I think the fact that we'll heavily use the USMC on board our new carriers leans toward using their AAR kit, i.e. Ospreys. We won't need to buy them if we can use the Marines.
  14. Absolutely beautiful!