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Technik1.wills

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About Technik1.wills

  • Birthday 18/03/1963

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    http://www.users.freenetname.co.uk/~techie2 (under construction - enter at your own risk!)
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    Del.NelsonWills

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    Male
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    Worthing, West Sussex
  • Interests
    Military aircraft 1930's 0nwards

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  1. Dear Tech Support, 

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend to Husband and noticed a distinct slowdown in overall system performance, particularly in the flower and jewellery applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend.

In addition, Husband uninstalled many other valuable programmes, such as Romance and Personal Attention and then installed undesirable programs such as Rugby, Football, Motor Racing and Continuous TV. Conversation no longer runs, and Housecleaning simply crashes the system. I've tried running Nagging to fix these problems, but to no avail.

 What can I do?

 Signed, Desperate 

.....................................................................................................

 Dear Desperate,

 First keep in mind, Boyfriend is an Entertainment Package, while Husband is an Operating System. Please enter the command: 'http://I Thought You Loved Me.html' and try to download Tears.

 Don't forget to install the Guilt update. If that application works as designed, Husband should then automatically run the applications Jewellery and Flowers, but remember - overuse of the above application can cause Husband to default to Grumpy Silence, Garden Shed or Beer. Beer is a very bad program that will download the Snoring Loudly Beta.

 Whatever you do, DO NOT install Mother-in-law (it runs a virus in the background that will eventually seize control of all your system resources). Also, do not attempt to reinstall the Boyfriend program. These are unsupported applications and will crash Husband.

 In summary, Husband is a great system, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. It also tends to work better running one task at a time. You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance. We recommend Food and Hot Lingerie.

 Good Luck,
 Tech Support
  2. Many years ago, BAC were testing the windshield of Concorde for safety against birdstrike, prior to its first flight, at Farnborough. The windshield was securely mounted on a rig and a high-velocity, large compressed-air gun was mounted opposite it, a large distance away - in effect, a single-shot firing-range. The gun was loaded with a chicken, purchased from the local store. The windshield rig was positioned and, when everyone was safely out of the way, the gun was fired. One day, an American Military delegation were visiting and were invited to watch a test. At the conclusion, they were impressed. One of them said "Well, we're developing an interceptor aircraft, with aroung the same speed as your airliner - can we borrow the test-rig and gun from you, to test the windshield? Negotiations took place and, following the conclusion of Concorde's windshield testing, the rig and gun were loaned to USA. THe F4 windshield was mounted, with a time-expired ejector-seat, on the rig; the gun was positioned at the required distance and loaded with a chicken. The gun duly fired...The chicken shot out of the gun, through the windshield of the F-4 and embedded itself solidly and intact, in the headrest of the ejector seat. Stunned and speechless, the test engineers and Military stood in shock. Finally, one of the Officers spoke "We just don't get it - everything was set up, exactly as for the test we saw oner in UK; what do we do now? Eventually, after a long silence, one of the test engineers spoke, in a subdued tone: "I guess we'd better telegram BAC..." Some days later, the US team assembled to consider BAC's reply - again, by telegram. They opened it and read the instructions aloud, until they reached the point just before loading the gun, which read: "Having thawed the chicken, load it into the gun..." The BAC engineers were reportedly incapable of working for the remainder of the week, when they had recieved the American's telegram!
  3. I have recently bought the "airwaves" detailing kit (brass) and am wondering how (or if) it should be painted, using enamels. Anyone able to give me the "heads up", please?
  4. I use the "Opera" browser, which has done everything I need - faultlessly; definitely no issues watching videos. http://www.opera.com/download
  5. The Rotol contra-prop was a joint Rolls-Royce & Bristol development, whereas the D-H one was a development of the "Hamilton Standard" constant - speed prop, which D-H manufactured under licence. The two contra-props were not interchangeable...
  6. Whatever you do, DON'T paint it - you will "trash" the value of it!
  7. The real issue is "what glue/cement did you use"? This should at least help someone point you in the best direction to releasing the ordnance and then putting maters right...
  8. OK Bill - clearly free speech and opinion is simply not allowed on this part of the forum; that is, unless it concurs with yours! I thought that this was a "British" modeller's forum, where opinion, ideas, etc were welcome. Obviously, I have hit a "raw nerve". Maybe you'd like to report me to the moderators and have me removed and banned?? >:-( Derek Nelson-Wills, AMBCS
  9. Well, this is fairly typical. They STEAL our design, then decide they can do better without us, then bribe us to join THEIR new project (for a huge cost) and then, when it doesn't work, they ground it and IT WILL COST US for them to "fix" it. WE always end up paying for their mistakes/problems/failures - somehow... Serves them right. We should have started development for the supersonic variant of the Harrier (i.e P1154) straight after the GR7/9 entered service.
  10. I have searched and searched - to no avail...please can anyone point me to where I can find photos of the type of Sonobuoys we used on the MR2 Shackleton (Growler) during the heady days of the 1950's - 1960's?? In hope/borderline despair...
  11. Hi Airfix - well, what about it? Will you do a model of the Valetta soon (for Dennis and his friends)? Whilst I'm at it, how about two more British "V" planes - the Viscount and Vanguard (Pleeeaaase!)?
  12. Have any of you read "wavetops at my wingtips"? fascinating, as it was about a pilot who was shot down over occupied Europe, escaped, returned to UK and, to avoid him being shot down over the same territory, was posted to Coastal Command and ended up flying the "Porcupine" (Sunderland). Several very good, clear photos (in b&w) though...
  13. My sincere apologies for my faux-pas earlier!
  14. Hi Dennis - many thanks! Just two questions, though - which bit is the Lindholme gear and what are the other "cannisters"? I presume that the Lindholme is the big white tube-shaped item on the starboard side of the bomb-bay (left side of photo); The two items next to it are clearly sonobuoys, so please what are the three cannisters at the extreme aft of the bay beyond the big white tube-shaped item? Great photo, and happy model-making! Derek.
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